I'm Addicted to Tootsie-Pops!


For ten and a half months I have smoked an average of a half a pack of cigarettes a day.  As of Saturday, when I embarked on another 5 day Academy for Spiritual Formation, I decided I would no longer be a smoker.  I'm not going to try to quit.  I'm simply going to be a non-smoker.  

After treatment, as I faced life without my drugs of choice, I picked up an addiction that simply replaced another addiction.  Clearly I have an addictive personality so my new addiction is Tootsie-Pops!  If you see me constantly sucking on a lollipop, remember that it's because I'm sober and a non-smoker.  To be honest, the cigarettes served me well this past year, but my one year sobriety birthday is a week from today and they no longer fill a need.

I owe whatever strength I've found in this journey to God and God alone.  My spiritual life has become key to recovery and I find myself more in tune with God than I ever have before.  The 12 steps are simply Christian practices, not doctrine, but practices, and as I work the program I find myself becoming more and more Christian as my doctrines that I've clung to give way to my heart.

When I was in treatment, a very wise spiritual director who was a recovering UCC pastor and alcoholic said to me, "Susan, you went to seminary for your head.  Imagine this place to be seminary for your heart."  A heart theology has been my inspiration this past year and it is a heart theology that heals the broken and leads to transformation.  I am a work in progress.

12 comments:

  1. Yay for Tootsie Pops! I hope it is okay to comment here. I am glad to be able to support your journey in any way I can! Growing up in the home of two smokers and a mother who struggled with alcohol addiction, I can relate to the impact and the power of addiction. I am thankful you are making such progress on this journey of sobriety. Praise God. We love you! Love the idea of seminary for your heart:)

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  2. I endorse this plan. I quit smoking when I had 15 months clean and wow, did I eat a LOT of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and suck on a lot of butterscotch candy. It got me through. And then the candy addiction faded later.

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