There's a meeting at noon everyday in Vancouver called "Miracles." It is always an amazing meeting filled with a ton of old-timers (that's people who have decades of sobriety). The thing that always amazes me about these old-timers is that when they share, they always share a little bit about what it was like before they got sober. In some cases, these stories are over 30, 40, even 50 years old! What astounds me is how they remember those stories. I have trouble remembering what I had for breakfast this morning, I can't imagine how I'm going to remember my drunk days thirty years from now. And yet, I think that the reason these old-timers have time is because they don't forget. They make an effort to remember. Going to meetings helps us remember.
I think that folks who end up losing their sobriety do so because they choose to forget. Who wants to remember all this embarrassing shameful horrible times? Not me. If I had it my way, I'd want to wipe those memories from my mind all together and pretend they never happened. And yet, if I forget, don't I run the risk of repeating history?
As much as I don't like it, I think I do need to remember those dark days. Doing so will keep me living day to day in the light.
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