90 Days of Truth-Telling
90 days. That's how much sobriety I have today. I get my 90 day coin today which I'm oddly excited about. Strange to be excited for a small piece of metal that will just collect dust on my bureau.
Ken has made some statements about my blog that go something like this: "You do realize you said "shit" and told everyone you smoked pot in your last blog don't you?" Yup. I do realize that. I'm making public all my little secrets. Some may think that I'm revealing too much, that some things should be kept to oneself, or at least not posted on the world wide web for all to see. But I maintain two things about my transparency: 1-I have to believe that my honesty is helping another. To say what others just think helps us to not feel so alone. That's why I love Anne Lamott so much. And 2- I'm convinced that if I didn't go public about every little thing, I would not maintain my sobriety.
You see I believe that we are inter-connected. It is through our knowledge of one another's celebrations and struggles that we're fused together into one body. If you didn't know what I was dealing with, how could you send your good mojo out into the universe giving me the willingness and strength to persevere? I am convinced, that what keeps me sober is that my circle of friends, related family and church family know about my disease of addiction. I have so many people pulling for me and praying for me that the mere thought of letting any of you down keeps me from pulling into the market for a nice chilled bottle of Chardonnay.
So this 90 day coin is for you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart and please keep sending me all that good mojo. It's working :)